You can go there, but come back

We have all heard the “Pink Elephant theory, right?

If you haven’t, it is as simple as this: If I tell you not to think about a pink elephant, what did you just think of?

A pink elephant, I assume.

Peak performance is very similar. No matter what you are working towards and what your goal is, odds are you think about it all the time. Why else would you do it, right? However, we are often told that we should focus on the process and not the outcome. Told to focus on the steps that we need to take to get there rather than the destination. That is true, but it is not absolute.

For me, during my time as an Olympic athlete I always wanted to win the race. Whether it was the Olympics, National Championships, World Championships, whatever it was I wanted to win it. I wanted to stand on the podium, hold the trophy, win the prize money.

Early on in my career I struggled with peak performance, being clutch, and executing when it mattered most. I had all the ingredients; speed, strength, ability, tactics, etc. but I wasn’t always getting it all out when the pressure was on. I needed to figure out how to fix this and be better.

My coach and I did a deep dive to figure out why, and what we found was throughout my competition day I would make a concerted effort NOT to think about the outcome. I would avoid it at all costs, because that was what I thought was the right thing to do. Without realizing it though, I was giving myself the “pink elephant” effect. I was subconsciously thinking about the outcome while consciously making an effort not to, confusing my brain. I would get mad at myself if I thought about the outcome too much. I remember days where I would say out-loud to myself “Connor, what are you doing?” Race days were not enjoyable for me at this point.

That was when my coach gave me some of the best advice he ever gave me, and something that sticks with me to this very day, something I use in all facets of my life.

“You can go there, but make sure you come back”

What coach meant by that was that it is okay to think about the end result, it was okay to think about winning, just don’t stay there for too long. Give yourself a time limit. This was a huge relief for me because now I was able to finally race freely and not be constantly fighting with myself on my thoughts. If I found myself daydreaming about the podium, about the trophies, about the prize money, or how good it was going to feel to win, that was okay. Just don’t do it for too long. I just had to think about it for a moment, then make sure I came back to the present and re-focused on the steps it would take to get there.

When I learned that, my results instantly improved and I was having more fun throughout race days. It was a win win.

Now that my competition days are over, I apply that same rule to whatever it is I am doing. If I am preparing for a keynote speech, I can imagine myself in a flow state on the stage and a standing ovation after, and that is okay for a moment, but after, I need to come back and lock into the process of preparation. If I am filming for my TV show, I can think about how awesome the episode is going to be briefly, but then I need to come back to the moment, be present, and focus on getting the best content we can for the show.

No matter what your goal is, no matter what you are working towards, it is healthy to daydream. Give yourself permission to think about the end goal, to think about why you are so dedicated and working so hard, but after you do that for a moment come back to the process that is going to get you there.

“You can go there, just make sure you come back”