Self Talk

There is only one person that you will have to talk to every single day for the rest of your life… yourself.

Now, I know you might be thinking “that’s crazy, I don’t talk to myself”, but trust me, you do. Everyone has that little voice in their head that commentates on what is going on, what they think will happen, and what they need to do. The sooner you can turn that voice into an ally rather than an enemy, the more successful you will allow yourself to become. The higher the pressure gets the more likely you will have that little voice going in your head getting louder and begin to express some self doubt. When you are cooking breakfast that voice may say “make some bacon” but if you find yourself lined up for the Olympic final it might say something like “what if you blow it and this entire 4 year process was for nothing.”

A bit different.

Early on, I never knew much about self talk or considered altering the way that I spoke to myself. Once I was made aware of the strategy, it was a massive help and my mental game really took off. There are two ways that I approached self talk throughout my career. One was conceptual, and the other was literal. I will share both as I know everyone is different, and what works for you may be one or the other specifically.

The first exposure I had to it was a book. The book was called “The Chimp Paradox”

This book was suggested to me by my coach at the time, Jamie Staff. Jamie is an Olympic Gold medalist himself so I eagerly read that book with the hopes I could follow in Jamie’s footsteps. It is definitely a book I recommend. If you are not a reader, or don’t plan to read it, here is a quick summary of what I took from it.

There is a chimp that lives in your head.

Always. It will always be there.

Sometimes it beats its chest, runs around causing destruction, and throws you off. Throwing bananas around and at you.

You cannot get rid of this chimp, this chimp will live inside your head forever. What you can do is control it and learn how to live with it. Instead of letting it run around all crazy, build a cage to put it inside. Feed it some bananas, leave it alone, and allow yourself to move on while controlling the chimp. It is the chimp that says “you can’t do it” and “you’re going to mess up.” Not you. You can control that chimp and keep it busy so it does not get out of its cage and run around in your head.

We all know what that is like, and we have all been there, letting that chimp run a little too wild.

That is an extremely short paraphrase, of a complex psychology book, but basically, that chimp is a metaphor for the little voice in your head and like that little voice, it will always be there, you just have to learn how to control it.

The second technique I used was more literal. This one was given to me by a great sport psychologist I worked with during my time with the Olympic team. I recognize that this might sound a bit crazy when I explain it, but hey, it worked for me.

Coach yourself. Talk to yourself. Imagine that voice is a different person, it is not you. There are two people inside you. One is the you that you want to be/say/do. There is the you that you don’t want to be, saying things you don’t want to say, and doing things you don’t want to do. Talk it down, coach yourself away from it.

The higher the stakes, the more active your brain typically becomes. When there is no pressure it is easy to be calm, cool, and collected. Put the pressure on, and the common reaction is to have things in your head ramp up.

There were race days I would literally talk out loud to myself and coach myself. I remember at the Olympics in Rio I had a negative thought come up before the Olympic final. “What if you blow it again, like in London?” To which I replied out loud “shut the **** up.” I don’t remember If anyone was around me, but if so they probably thought I was crazy. That happened often, and it was a bit extreme, (me talking out loud to myself) but it worked for me. To this day I use both strategies and coach myself almost daily. Sometimes my chimp gets out and runs around, but I always do my best to put the chimp back in its cage. I still talk to myself and coach myself out loud, I just double check that no one is around first.

The mental game is so important for sport and really for life. I hope these strategies can help you!

-CF